Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Tears of change and growth

I kind of thought this day would come but I guess it impacted me more than I expected. Alexandra told me yesterday that she didn't want to go to School. I told her we would see about it on Tuesday. This morning she told me the same thing. We got clothes on and went to school. We got there and she saw her friends and I thought we were ok. Then we got ready to leave and she started crying and asking to go with Buddy and I. I told her I'd come back but the crying only got louder. The teacher tried to distract her but she ended up carrying Alexandra over to a craft table. As we're leaving I hear her still crying. It was hard to hold back my tears but I did until we got to the car. I cried the whole way home. Not because I didn't want to leave her but because of the look on her face when we left. She was so scared. I think Preschool is a good thing for her and for me. It's a good program and I think the activities are good for her. What I'm thinking this morning is that this is just the first of many tears of change and growth. I'm not looking forward to shedding many many tears in the future over my kids and the changes that will come for all of us. You don't think about those things when you have a baby and with no instruction manual there's no warning of things like this on the horizon!

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